Flowers in May — pt.1. Thank you for making me bloom — even… | by my dearest | Jul, 2025
Chapter 2—Tangled
On the way home, my parents asked, “How was your day?”
“It was fun, but I’m tired now. I want to sleep,” I replied.
They simply nodded. When I arrived, I chatted with them for a while, did my usual night routine, and went straight to my bedroom.
But I didn’t sleep.
I just laid there, staring at the ceiling. My head full of thoughts. My eyes drifted to the lotus I had placed in a vase of water on my desk.
I couldn’t sleep. The reality felt… unsettling.
“Why did everything I once wished for about him suddenly start appearing again — just when I thought I had found a new kind of happiness?”
“Was I merely distracted from the wound that never truly healed?”
Even so, I kept writing letters — hoping they would quiet the noise in my head. After that day, we still met each other over and over again.
And even just for a fleeting moment, always felt like enough. As time went by, I carefully tended the lotus I received that day. But no matter how much I cared for it, the petals still began to fall. It withered anyway.
Months passed. We moved up to the second year, and our classes were shuffled — permanently this time. And once again, our paths crossed. We were assigned to the same school event, along with my first crush. That was when I saw you again — and him, too. Guilt quietly crept into my chest.
What if I ended up hurting you the way he once hurt me?
Was it wrong to still fall for you even when my heart was still wounded?
I didn’t want the sun to set and disappear from my sight — not again.
Then came September. And slowly, I started to accept:
“Even if I gave my all to preserve the freshness of blooming flowers, they would still wither. Not because anyone was to blame. But because that was just how fate works. I acknowledged the wounds still lingered inside me. I stopped pretending they weren’t there. I let everything be as it was meant to be.”
“I would love you in silence. And I would let you go in peace.”
