🌤️ Somdul – The Balance of the First Light Within | by Somdul | Nov, 2025
📍Saraburi, Thailand
Sometimes,
the things we think are “special”
find us quietly,
long before we understand what they mean.
When I was a child, music moved me in a way I didn’t know how to explain.
Whenever I heard a rhythm – any rhythm —
my body reacted before my mind did.
My first memory of it was in kindergarten.
There’s only one photo left from that time,
me on a small stage,
wearing makeup for a performance I can no longer remember.
I don’t know what the song was,
I only remember this:
I got to dance.
And that was when a small light inside me first began to show.
When I reached primary school, our school had a temple inside the grounds.
One year, they held a dance contest between classrooms
and asked the students to choreograph everything themselves.
I told my friends,
“Let’s join – I’ll make the dance.”
So I sat in front of the TV, copying moves from music videos.
I don’t remember if we won.
I only remember that feeling again:
I got to dance.
And it made me happy.
Later, our school held a cheerleading competition.
We were divided into colour teams, and mine was purple.
At practice, seniors asked loudly:
“Who wants to be a cheerleader? Stand up!”
Of course I didn’t stand.
I was shy.
Scared.
The whole school was watching.
But my friend – maybe he saw something in me —
picked up a small rock from the ground
and slipped it into my shorts.
I panicked and stood up to shake it out…
exactly when the seniors were choosing volunteers.
And that’s how I became a purple cheerleader by accident. 😂
On weekends, I took extra classes with friends.
One day after class, we walked through a mall
and saw a last-minute lip-sync dance contest.
I told my friend, “Let’s do it.”
She said, “But we don’t have costumes.”
I said, “Wait here.”
I borrowed a tablecloth and fake flowers from a shop nearby,
turned them into outfits,
and we joined the competition.
We won 3rd place.
With a tablecloth.
Years later, in middle school, I moved to a new town.
There was another cheerleading audition.
This time I wasn’t as scared.
I auditioned – and I got in again.
Then I applied for every dance group I could find:
modern dance, Thai classical, everything.
Eventually I was chosen to represent my school in a traditional dance competition.
We took first place.
But life moved again.
My family needed to relocate to Bangkok.
A new school, a new beginning.
They were holding auditions to compete at Seacon Square —
a big deal back then.
I danced once, without hesitation.
Four seniors were judging.
One rejected me.
But another said,
“I want this kid. He has something in him.”
I didn’t get in.
But that was okay.
Trying was already meaningful.
After finishing middle school, I chose to study vocational instead of high school.
I lived alone in Bangkok while my mother went to help my sister raise her newborn.
I kept auditioning for dance teams
and eventually passed – as the first one in the junior group.
One day, a senior dancer got sick before a big performance.
The choreographer looked at me and said,
“Tor, you dance in her place.”
All eyes turned to me.
The newest dancer.
The youngest.
Suddenly chosen.
It was hard – physically and emotionally.
But over time, everything found its rhythm.
Including the little light inside me.
Later, my family moved again,
this time to Chonburi.
A teacher there told me,
“Tor, make a dance team. We only have three days.”
We didn’t even have costumes.
So I redesigned our daily school uniform
and turned it into stage outfits.
Our team won 1st place.
And that was the beginning —
the first light inside me
long before I met the real stages of life.
Sometimes,
the light within us
doesn’t appear when we’re ready.
It appears when our heart keeps moving,
even when we’re scared.
– Tor
📸 This photo is truly my first light —
before I knew how far dance would take me,
before I understood anything,
only knowing that my heart felt alive
every time I moved with the music.
✨ #Balance #Somdul #ChildhoodDreams #DanceJourney #FindingYourLight
